Why torture yourself if you’re not gifted?

They ask me constantly. And on the topic of earnings, and on the topic of YouTube, and now about programming. And the message is simple: if you do something badly and you don’t succeed right away, then just don’t do it, because obviously you don’t have the ability to do this. Do something else. I just want to add: “plant flowers, give birth to children”. Before, I also strongly believed in talents and predispositions, since I am lazy and I wanted something to work out by itself, as it was “given” to me by nature. And you don’t need to study, torturing yourself too. Oh, what a beauty! As a result: either I am so untalented and I was “not given” something by nature, or all these fairy tales about “given / not given” are just beautiful excuses to explain my own situation. After all, if it turns out that I can get something that is so interesting, but as if “not given”? What is this! Will I have to “suffer” for textbooks and puzzles in order to succeed?

It’s hard and I don’t want to give up the idea that I’m good for something just like that from birth, that I’m also talented in something. There is some “my” business that I just need to find. And it goes like clockwork by itself. I have been looking for myself and my business for years, and even decades. It turned out to find one thing, then another. And then, rebellious, you seek again, as if there is peace in the sea. And all the time doubts, but is it? And if it’s not? Maybe you should look further? How to understand? I just now realized how simple everything is in my life. Everything has already been found in it: it is I myself. And then, these are the nuances.

And I myself am always interested in something, curious, I want something. This is mine. It works, it doesn’t work, it doesn’t matter. Then something will work. Or there will be a new interest. And it doesn’t matter either. Because there is nothing more important than what is now and your interest in it. If interest is lost, then that’s it, this is the end. And then either go to the right or to the left. Or stay here, but without interest, even sitting still is difficult. And if there is interest, then it will take you somewhere where the sun is shining, tasty and warm.